Friday, June 22, 2007

What If...I lost my agenda?

I've just returned from vacation. I had planned on it being a working vacation but I immediately changed my plans upon my arrival. Instead, I chose to spend some "quality" time with God and my children. I chose NOT to work.

Some interesting things were taking place before I left. I found myself at a loss in dealing with the circumstances surrounding me. I truly believe that God provided this time of rest and restoration to remove me from any impact I could make had I stayed. Though I felt resistance to the "agenda" of others, I also felt compelled to practice silence. To allow God to work it out. With the release came the peace. Go figure.

But...it did bring into question my own "agenda"....for myself, my family, my community, my career. I spent a week on the beach with nothing to "do". I prayed alot. Most of it silent prayer. I really wanted to hear God. Quite frankly, I haven't come home with the "answers" but I have come home with a feeling of "smallness". Don't misunderstand me. I'm not talking about value here. Rather, this idea that I am but a single speck of His creation.

God has an "agenda" that connects His entire creation. If only I could find His agenda and lose mine. Now, that's a worthy goal. Is it not?

3 comments:

Shalene said...

The question is Randee, will you willingly lose your agenda? I've found recently that I was doing the same thing. I had a plan and an agenda of my own, and wasn't waiting upon the Lord for direction. After much prayer and consideration for what His plan is in my life, I think I've come away with a much bigger picture, and that same sense of smallness that you mention. You go girl! It's not always easy to let go of our agendas, especially if you're an "idea person" like you and I are. God's plan will come to pass, even when we don't will it. Right? Right!

Randee said...

Amen, Sister. In total and complete agreement.

Been praying for you.

Lori Arriaga said...

If only it was easier done then said! A very worthy goal! I know all too well getting caught up in my own agenda.